The Noytard: Stupidity Redefined

Shit For BrainsWith The 2016 Philippine election season rapidly approaching. Social media has seen itself kicked into overdrive by an ever mounting influx of political party banter. Their propaganda. Opposition mudslinging. And of course. The ever popular endless foray of garbage being tossed about by the pro-Aquino – anti-everyone else – bunch of goofs known collectively as Noytards.

Now this is not to say that what they are posting and/or commenting is all lies, myths, twisted truth, and shit. But on many levels it comes pretty damn close.

And I shall explain why. But first let us talk about the most popular or well known of all the Tards. The anti-Marcos bunch.

This group is the most lively bunch. Ranging in age from 25 to 60. These characters will spend most of their days – and nights – flooding nearly every Facebook page with their garbage. And I say garbage, because most of it is seriously outdated. And carries little or no value in today’s world. Here are a few examples:

  • Droning on about the Martial Law years as if it’s happening at this very moment.
  • Talking about the arrest, jailing and alleged murder of people as if it’s current news.
  • Constant references to the financial status of the Philippines 40 years ago. Especially making note of the Dollar-Peso value then. Which, by the way. Was less than half of what it is today.
  • Insisting that everyone accept that Senator Ninoy Aquino was killed – or ordered killed – by President Marcos. And no one else.

And the list goes on. So why do they continue this bizarre crusade? Why forcibly demand their readers accept their dribble? And worst of all? Why do they go absolutely nuts if anyone disagrees with them?

Fear. Plain and simple.

And oddly enough. It’s not really the fear of another Marcos entering their world. As they would have you believe. It’s actually the fear that you, the reader, just might have realized you have a brain. Are capable of thinking for yourself. And don’t want to play their game any longer. This drives them completely over the top. And almost all will attack you with rude and crude slang. And no matter how you retort. They will continue their personal attacks.

“How to deal with this type of idiocy” you ask?

Noytard FamilyUnless absolutely necessary. Do not respond in kind. That is actually what they want. Remain as calm as possible in your replies. This will drive them bonkers. They may even get worse verbally. Again, don’t allow them to drag you in. Ask them why they are acting in such a manner? Ask if they can either prove themselves right. Or more importantly, you wrong. Sadly, no matter what you do. They will keep up the attacks against you, or your posting.

They will even go so far as tell you you know what you have done, or are doing wrong. When you ask what it was. Again, they will call you stupid for not knowing. And start up again with the insults.

The bottom line is this folks. You are more than likely dealing with a Troll who is either on orders to not interact with others. Or is simply a blind wombat who has become so screwed up since the EDSA1 disaster. They can no longer think correctly. And like a “bible thumper.” Suffer from cognitive dissonance. Thus, are beyond the pale of human logic. And now exist purely as an entertainment piece in our off-hours.

Which leads us to the more classic Noytard. These are the regular folks out there. And in most cases. Are less likely to be a troll. Which makes them easier to deal with. Or at the least. Someone you can carry on a more realistic conversation with. Keep in mind though. You are still dealing with someone who believes themselves to be right in almost all cases.

The first of this group, are the pro-Aquino bunch. These are the ones convinced – in spite of the nations obvious, rapid decline – that President BS Aquino. By virtue of some unknown birthright. Is their savior. No matter how screwed up the country has become since he took office in 2010. They come running to his side. A perfect example of how silly most of these defensive Lemmings act. BS Aquino decided he would visit the opening of a new Mitsubishi car plant. Rather then be present for the return of the bodies of the fallen 44 PNP-SAF Commandos who had been massacred by the Moro Islamic Liberation Front, this past January 25th, in Mindanao. Like a pack of guard dogs, they will come to his defense on all levels. Even when they know its wrong.

The next batch are the anti-corrupt politician goofs. I refer to them as goofs because they are the ones going nuts at current Vice-President Binay and his family over the still unproven over-pricing of some buildings in Makati. As well as any other political figure allegedly involved in some shady financial dealings under the Aquino administration. But wait… Why aren’t these idiots pointing any fingers at the allies of the president? Haven’t the majority of both the House and Senate been involved in the billion peso PDAF/DAP scandal? They scream about Senators Marcos, Sotto, and Legarda from the opposition. But why not Bam Aquino, Chiz Escudero, Antonio Trillanes and the others? Oh! That’s right! No one associated with the Liberal Party could ever be guilty. Right?

Another is the OFW-Noytard. These are the lively characters that have been working overseas for some time now. Haven’t a fucking clue of what’s been going on back home. And defend BS Aquino, making claims of massive infrastructure improvements. World Bank, IMF credit rating boosts. GDP increases. Etc. All the while, completely brain-dead unaware of how screwed up the nation has been these past five years. They will argue the financial numbers game. And insist it’s Gods holy gospel truth. But of course, they will never publicly admit they are loving the current exchange rate of P46.6-$1.

While there are hordes of other Tards out there. My last group are what I call the “dazed and confused” Noytards. These are the ones who are also pro-Aquino. And don’t really know why. They usually chime into a post and make stupid comments such as “Noynoy Parin” and disappear. In fact. Many will make the stupid little remarks inside a posting that hasn’t anything to do with BS Aquino. The Liberal Party. Mickey Mouse. Or even the man in the moon. They just have this stupid need to be seen. More than likely, born of a childhood trauma. Such as getting caught for eating the paste of their nose dirt. Or dumped by the prom queen. And after 20 years. Still haven’t recovered.

So there you have it. My own little observation of the Noytards. Much of which is based on personal experience. And if I neglected to mention any specific Tard in general. And it hurts. then I am sorry I scratched the surface of your paper thin ego.


Just a regular "Joe" who decided the rat-race in the states was getting to ridiculous for words, and made the move to the Asian side of life.

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6 thoughts on “The Noytard: Stupidity Redefined

  1. First of all, if you start your opinion with a derogatory term that ends with a “tard”, you already lose the any moral standing you base your opinion on. Retardation is a serious affliction that affects the whole family with regards to its social stigma. People should be educated against the use of such terms and you aren’t helping it in any way. Second of all, if you haven’t noticed because you are one yourself, there is a multitude of ignorant posts hailing the late President Marcos’ accomplishments while neglecting his crimes. There are voluminous sources/documents that can verify the plunder of Marcoses, not to mention the victims of Martial Law. People are mentions these things to try to educate those who believed in Marcos propaganda which only proves there are still a lot of loyalists out there who wants to change history in favor of their Macchiavelian hero.

    1. Thanks for the feedback. Too bad you overlooked the fact that I am not the least bit interested in YOUR history lesson(s) regarding Marcos. Let alone the man in the moon. Nor am I here to make fun of retardation and the issues that go along with it. But since you seem to belong to the class of people my article was in regards to. Keep this much in mind. It was a FILIPINO who created the term itself. And quite possibly due to the social stigma brought on by the idiocy(s) of those who, for some ungodly reason, insist on defending the Palace halfwit.

  2. The author talks about the paid trolls in the social media that the Aquino government has been working on since and that they keep preventing our country from moving forward, this has no reference to another one of those trying to justify the Marcos years as either good or bad, the first comment would suggest here we go again with people who keeps shaking their heads, reminding everyone, particularly the youth not to forget the evil years, better discuss it in a proper forum, as far as I know, this is a fun write-up defining filipino stupidity at present.

    1. Actually? It’s wasn’t fun to write at all. But it has to be pointed out. And talking about the so-called “evil years” is the same as talking about Germany during Hitler’s time. If you want to talk about it. Great! The difference is this. Germany enjoys talking about those years using a different frame of mind. Where as these Facebook Trolls and other goofs. Talk about it, as if it’s current news. And in doing so. Are completely denying a near 30 year old wound to heal. Why can’t the Filipino get past this idiocy?

  3. You forget one important thing. Most Noytards aren’t real. It’s just a handful of people with multiple social media accounts who try to dominate public discussion in an inane and ineffective way.

    In a way, we are seeing PNot’s online personality. He is known to be onion skinned, petty, and disdainful of any kind of criticism without presenting any practical solution to anything. Hence this ineffective PR strategy of employing Noytards to drown out public discussion. It’s backfiring big time. But then again, don’t anybody tell malacanang that it is so. LOL!

  4. Thank you for your views on this. You are correct about on your side. I strongly agree with the names Noytards and Yellowtards we can’t blame ourselves from calling them. As you notice, they argue but they don’t know what they are talking about. They goes to videos without watching because all they want is to bash or to protect their idols Aquionos. The even called them the Yellow Slaves because they were slaves by the beliefs based on the opinion of others.

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